What is Abuse?
Definition of Domestic Abuse
Domestic abuse is a system of coercive behaviors used by adults or adolescents to establish and maintain power and control over a partner or family member.
Threatening deportation, outing your sexual orientation to your friends and family without your consent, calling you racist names, isolating you from those that speak your language, isolating you from people who practice similar cultural and/or religious traditions, forbidding you to practice your chosen faith, destroying your immigration documents/preventing you from receiving residence status, preventing access to your wheelchair, cane or other adaptive equipment, denying access to your medication.
Looming over you, getting "in your face," blocking a doorway, grabbing you if you try to leave, kicking, punching, biting, slapping, choking/strangling, threatening to harm you, using weapons, throwing or breaking things, punching walls, driving recklessly, burning, pulling hair, stabbing, trying to confine you, preventing you from seeking medical care, restricting access to medication, murder.
Giving intimidating looks and gestures, playing mind games, twisting the facts around, making you feel like you’re losing your mind, not accepting blame, wrongful accusations, lying, manipulation, insults, humiliation and/or making you feel badly about yourself, not listening to your point of view, being jealous or possessive, excessive paging or calling, intercepting your phone message or emails, not allowing you to have or limiting contact with friends or family, controlling where you go and when, stalking, accusations of cheating, using privilege.
Yelling, shouting, swearing, continuously arguing, interrupting, talking over you, put downs, name calling, talking down to you or patronizing you, using loud and threatening tone and language, intimidating you, mocking you, abusive language, threatening to take the children away or report you to the authorities.
Unwanted sexual touching, vulgar comments, pressure for sex, treating you like an object, forcing you to use or not use birth control, prohibiting safe sex practices, forcing pregnancy or abortion, forcing you to have sex with other people, forcing you to participate in pornography, date or marital rape.
Withholding money, making you ask for money, not allowing access to financial accounts, giving you an allowance, not allowing you to work or get an education, putting all bills/credit cards in your name, preventing use of a vehicle.
Indicators of lethality
The following are indicator of lethality. When anyone of these factors are present in the abusive relationship, it increases the level of danger and possibility of homocide. If any of these factors are present in your relationship, please consider a safety plan to increase your safety and decrease harm of you and or your children.
Access to/ownership of weapons
Strangulation or suffocation
Hostage-taking, Abduction or Stalking
Threats of suicide/homicide
Abuse of drugs or alcohol
Children from a previous relationship residing in the home
Threats to harm children
Escalation of severity and frequency of violence
Belief that partner may might kill her/him
You can call the hotline at (800) 547-1649 to discuss a safety plan
or contact our offices to speak to an advocate.
| Lynn Outreach Office
140 Union Street. Suite 214
Lynn, MA 01901
Office: (781) 592-9900
Fax: (781) 592-1460
|Gloucester Outreach Office
5 Pleasant Street
Gloucester, MA 01930
Office: (978) 283-8642
|Beverly Domestic Violence Unit
66 Herrick Street
Beverly, MA 01930
Office: (978) 922-1155
Fax (978) 921-1579
| HAWC @ NSMC
(North Shore Medical Center)
55 Highland Hall
Salem, MA 01970
Office: (978) 354-4383
Office: (978) 354 4894